This blog often contains uncomfortable subject matter and occasional sexual content. If you don't want to read about it, empower yourself to close the page. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Who died and made you king of anything? JK recently told me a story about BK, MY, and BG. I guess after a show, MY contacted JK saying something about a trip to the hospital, and asking him about quitting drinking. He assumed she had finally gotten alcohol poisoning. But no, apparently, at least once some time prior to this incident, BK had been behaving inappropriately toward MY, right in front of BG. The story JK relayed to me is that BK spent an hour or two telling MY she was so beautiful, and it's such a good thing they're friends, because they could kiss and it would be okay. They could make out and it wouldn't even matter because they're friends, it wouldn't mean anything. I'm told that at one point during this evening, BG threw a chair across the yard. Fast forward to not too long ago, the night of the show. MY was her special brand of extra drunk. BK was clinging on her again and it was pissing BG off, rightfully so. That's his fiance, you know. They ended up walking home, or something, and BK held her hand most of the way. It is not clear why he did this. Maybe he was just trying to hold her up, keep her from falling. But the story was relayed to me as if he had been simply holding her hand for the sake of holding it. Well, suddenly MY came to. Realized she didn't want that. Had a flashback to the time she was raped or something. FREAKED. OUT. She started thinking BG was trying to set her up or something? Like he was out to get her? I don't really understand that part of the story. I doubt she does, either. She gets so drunk sometimes, she stops making sense and starts getting upset when people don't understand what she's trying to say, or when she doesn't understand what she's trying to say. Because she was freaking out so badly, BG took her to the hospital. No idea if BK came with, but I'm guessing not, considering he triggered this whole episode. I haven't heard much else after JK told me this story. I'm not sure if MY and/or BG are even friends with BK, but I know they're still playing shows. They just keep booking them like crazy this summer. They even have one booked for Halloween already. I have no plans to attend any of them. I had already unfriended BK on Facebook after EH told me what he'd heard through the grapevine, about BK being "sketchy" about LS during our relationship. I was taking steps to drastically limit my contact with him, only to times when it was absolutely necessary - like if he contacted me first with a question about our previous landlord, or if I were to see him at a party. Now I just don't want to see him at all. What a piece of shit. What a huge piece of shit. The LS thing was bad enough, but I could at least understand it. He was unhappy with me. He thought she'd make him happier, maybe. It happens. It hurts the leftover partner, but it happens all the time. This, though, is entirely inappropriate. He's just being creepy. Just, ever since we broke up, he's been creepy. He's slept with at least two married women, one of whom was married to JK's lesbian friend. They got divorced - not over him, but over a bunch of other men she slept with, too. No word on how the second married woman's relationship turned out. Now he's going after his best friend and singer's fiance? In fucking front of him? I wonder if he's actually losing it. Finally going crazy for real. But you know what, it's helped me so much to hear all this stuff about him. I don't want him anymore, at all, and I mean it this time. I look at his pictures on Facebook, and he doesn't look like someone I love. He just looks like someone I used to know, an old friend I've lost touch with. I can't explain it, his face looks warped somehow in those pictures. I don't find him attractive anymore. He just looks like any other guy. I try to think about all the good moments we had, all the times spent cuddling in bed, how it felt to reach out and touch his chest hair... Nothing. I get nothing. Those memories used to send me into sobbing fits. I just don't see him the same way anymore. And just like that, the block with JK is removed. I don't feel like I'm lying when I say I love him. It still doesn't feel as intense as I recall it feeling with BK in the beginning, but I was twenty-one then. I'm older, more wary, and hesitant to let my guard down. BK wore away at me steadily over a period of five years. It takes time to feel right after that. I don't know how long. But I do know that JK has been consistently reliable. We're five months in and still haven't fought. We haven't had a need to. He's opened up to me more lately, and I have with him. It's been really nice letting myself settle into a steady level of comfort with him. 12:20 a.m. - 2014-07-15 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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