melonyellow's Diaryland
Diary
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2015-07-27 - Keep going... 2015-06-25 - Resurfacing 2015-06-24 - Ugh. 2015-06-02 - Deer, rain, and room mate drama 2015-05-06 - Hey did you know I have low self esteem, I never write about it or anything. 2015-05-01 - Fuck you, Dr. Asshole. 2015-04-11 - Handling it 2015-01-27 - SO ADULT, EVERYONE. 2015-01-21 - Bad at life 2015-01-20 - Car accident, weird BK news, JK is still wonderful. 2015-01-14 - Quitting ALLLLL the drugs 2015-01-08 - I am obsessed with having problems. 2014-12-31 - Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff 2014-12-22 - What I am doing instead of going to bed 2014-12-17 - ANS Scolds Herself #374 2014-12-17 - Eating peanut butter out of the jar with a fork. 2014-12-12 - Be! Depressive! B-E Depressive! B-E, D-E-P-R-E-S-S-I-V-E! 2014-12-09 - I heard waves 2014-11-19 - Fuck chores, knit more. 2014-11-10 - I forgot how to adult again. 2014-10-27 - Yay, I'm fat again 2014-09-27 - Bike rides, drinkin'. 2014-09-15 - Eh. 2014-09-07 - BK sighting 2014-09-01 - Update - day 5 2014-08-29 - Day 2 of Brain Repair 2014-08-28 - Today I join the medicated masses. 2014-08-08 - Horrible films about horrible people who remind me of myself. 2014-08-05 - So sane. 2014-07-29 - Guess who's not packing right now? 2014-07-26 - Old notes 2014-07-24 - Suicidal ideation 2014-07-21 - Playing house 2014-07-15 - How to be a person 2014-07-15 - Who died and made you king of anything? 2014-07-03 - "Crazy bitches" 2014-06-27 - Hey. 2014-06-25 - .. 2014-06-22 - Kind of shitty 2014-06-22 - . 2014-06-03 - . 2014-04-24 - - 2014-04-21 - On needing people 2014-04-03 - Here we go again with the L word. 2014-03-10 - JK 2014-02-13 - Yes. 2014-02-10 - Daaaaaaate 2014-02-10 - JK 2014-02-10 - Hmm. 2014-02-09 - And in this moment, I am happy. 2014-02-06 - Abort mission 2014-02-04 - Life lessons from Helen Keller. 2014-02-01 - Mom 2014-01-31 - An episode 2014-01-31 - MS 2014-01-28 - Me, me, me 2014-01-27 - "Forgetting" 2014-01-27 - Lost 2014-01-20 - . 2014-01-18 - Interested? Interesting... 2014-01-17 - HL. 2014-01-16 - AJ 2014-01-14 - - 2014-01-11 - . 2014-01-10 - Magnetic poetry: On loss 2014-01-09 - Yeah, I said it. 2014-01-08 - Fuckles. 2014-01-08 - Admonishments 2014-01-05 - Interesting new developments. 2014-01-04 - Uuugggghhhh. 2014-01-02 - God, really? 2014-01-02 - Ummmm, no. 2014-01-02 - Ugh. 2014-01-02 - Hmm. 2014-01-01 - Fuck you, 2013. 2013-12-30 - . 2013-12-21 - Tonight 2013-12-19 - Inappropriate 2013-11-10 - Blugh. 2013-10-14 - In over my head again and again 2013-09-04 - Girls, music 2013-08-25 - Drunken gossip 2013-08-13 - Boy crazy 2013-06-26 - Finally happened. 2013-01-20 - . 2012-12-31 - Ugh. 2012-12-18 - Shit. 2012-11-08 - Update November 2012 2012-02-22 - Updates, blah, blah 2011-12-15 - Grandma V 2011-11-06 - Update November 2011 2011-07-18 - This week's installment of insane neighbor drama 2011-07-09 - DIY haircut, insane neighbor drama 2011-06-25 - Crap, it's June. 2011-04-19 - Stagnating 2011-01-18 - More weight 2011-01-09 - How to trick hot women into having sex with you 2010-12-12 - I am getting pretty sick of this. 2010-12-09 - PMDD 2010-12-03 - It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care. 2010-11-29 - Seasonal pessimissm 2010-11-21 - Weird day 2010-11-20 - Mope, mope, mope 2010-11-19 - Blah, blah, boring updates 2010-11-18 - Friends 2010-11-06 - ... 2010-10-29 - Fucking fuck y'all 2010-10-10 - Losing patience 2010-10-09 - No life 2010-10-05 - Pain and sympathy 2010-10-05 - Unsatisfied 2010-10-01 - Drained 2010-09-03 - Eh 2010-08-18 - Why BK is so much smarter than you 2010-08-02 - Proud to be a Negative Nancy 2010-07-15 - . 2010-07-13 - Paralyzed 2010-07-09 - ... 2010-06-04 - Self-inflicted revenge 2010-06-03 - Fighting 2010-05-25 - Math problems 2010-05-23 - Oh my god. 2010-05-21 - BK is AWOL 2010-05-20 - YAY 2010-05-20 - New apartment! (hopefully?) 2010-05-17 - I think I broke a blood vessel 2010-05-17 - Bitter tonight 2010-05-16 - Ear twitch 2010-05-15 - Moving, relationships, and therapy 2010-04-25 - A weird dream 2010-03-26 - Ashamed of feeling proud 2010-03-19 - I submitted this to Dealbreaker 2010-03-18 - Why I am so batshit crazy 2010-02-22 - My weird coworker 2010-02-12 - Days of Our Shrieking Neighbors' Lives 2009-12-15 - I don't understand my emotions. 2009-11-20 - Hello again. 2009-05-22 - Late night anxiety 2009-05-21 - Why does everyone want to fuck me over? 2009-05-12 - Things that make me happy 2009-04-20 - Happy holidays 2009-04-16 - Decreased quality of life 2009-03-27 - They are all cattle. 2009-03-23 - Frustrated 2009-03-17 - - 2009-03-16 - Damn it. 2009-03-14 - Trapped 2009-03-09 - Shut-in 2009-03-06 - Willpower 2009-03-04 - Will finish this entry later? 2009-02-23 - So paranoid that I don't even trust myself. 2009-02-20 - Fuck. 2009-02-19 - Rage 2009-02-18 - Lonely as usual 2009-02-17 - Can't sleep 2009-02-04 - Breakthrough? 2009-01-26 - I HATE MY BODY!! 2009-01-24 - Good feelings for once 2009-01-22 - I almost got into a car accident today. 2009-01-17 - He scares me sometimes. 2009-01-11 - About love 2009-01-03 - Fuck this day. 2009-01-02 - So much for my good mood. 2008-12-31 - I've come to hate my body and all that it requires 2008-12-28 - Shut-in 2008-12-18 - I hate this self-obsessed culture. 2008-12-16 - Hmm 2008-12-10 - Fucked up dreams 2008-12-09 - Fuck 2008-12-03 - What the fuck. 2008-12-02 - God I hate December 2008-11-12 - I think of you all day long 2008-10-30 - The L-word? 2008-10-22 - Wasted away again in margaritaville 2008-10-17 - What's the point? 2008-10-11 - WOOOOOOOOOOO. 2008-10-10 - Bleh 2008-10-09 - Stressed out 2008-09-20 - Holy shit I did not disappear. 2008-06-28 - Sleep paralysis 2008-06-25 - WOOOOOO. 2008-06-22 - Something interesting happened 2008-06-21 - FUCK. 2008-06-19 - Stressed out 2008-06-18 - ... 2008-06-12 - Tonight 2008-06-11 - Doing better 2008-06-05 - Kansas sucks. 2008-06-02 - Confession 2008-06-01 - This weekend 2008-05-29 - Lame 2008-05-27 - Nervous 2008-05-26 - Man I need some sleep. 2008-05-22 - ... 2008-05-20 - Fuck you, PMS. 2008-05-19 - ... 2008-05-19 - Ridiculous weekend 2008-05-10 - I unlocked the diary again. 2008-05-10 - Nightmares 2008-05-03 - This will be a long entry. 2008-04-18 - Quitting? 2008-04-13 - My birthday 2008-04-07 - Party pooper 2008-04-02 - You don't trust anyone 'cause you're untrustable 2008-03-31 - My nose hurts! 2008-03-27 - I hate myself for hating myself. 2008-03-26 - Tired 2008-03-22 - Boooooored. 2008-03-12 - - 2008-03-03 - ... 2008-02-23 - Therapy 2008-02-18 - The past and the future 2008-02-16 - Lonely 2008-02-15 - Dang. 2008-02-14 - Confused 2008-02-08 - Lesson learned 2008-02-03 - Sick 2008-01-26 - I suck. 2008-01-26 - Things have never been so swell 2008-01-21 - I am not proud of myself tonight. 2008-01-18 - Food issues 2008-01-18 - It was a rock lobster 2008-01-06 - Fuck you, 2007. 2007-12-09 - Things have been going well. 2007-12-02 - Meh. 2007-11-29 - Dreams? 2007-11-22 - Tonight was awesome. 2007-11-21 - Tonight should be interesting. 2007-11-11 - My weekend got better 2007-11-10 - Sueisfine 2007-11-09 - Interesting developments in my love life 2007-10-29 - Crap. 2007-10-18 - I don't know 2007-10-12 - Fool me twice, shame on me 2007-10-09 - God damn it. 2007-10-08 - My dad 2007-10-01 - Still sick. 2007-09-30 - Uuuuugh. 2007-09-28 - Ugh. 2007-09-27 - Shit 2007-09-26 - :) 2007-09-24 - Space cadet 2007-09-22 - My brain is all fuzzy 2007-09-18 - Reaching out 2007-09-18 - I think I might be crazy? 2007-09-17 - Contradicting myself. 2007-09-16 - I don't know 2007-09-13 - Shit. 2007-09-09 - I hate today. 2007-09-07 - Tonight 2007-09-02 - Funny story 2007-09-02 - About the party 2007-09-01 - Whatever 2007-08-30 - Welcome back, PMS 2007-08-28 - Music that I like that you should like too 2007-08-28 - Damn. 2007-08-27 - I can't get enough 2007-08-26 - About last night 2007-08-25 - Holy crap. 2007-08-20 - Hmm. 2007-08-18 - What a night this has been. 2007-08-18 - A good day 2007-08-17 - Smitten (Again) 2007-08-14 - OCD? 2007-08-12 - Not the same anymore? 2007-08-08 - Appearance issues 2007-07-25 - Last night 2007-07-24 - It's called freedom of speech. 2007-07-24 - What the fuck. 2007-07-23 - Tired 2007-07-20 - Anxious tonight 2007-07-17 - I can't stop tearing the skin off my lips 2007-07-14 - Imaginary friends 2007-07-05 - Pretend relationship 2007-06-19 - Good thing I'm not very impulsive. 2007-06-18 - (No title) Last post from the blogger account 2007-06-16 - I don't even know. 2007-06-13 - Cooped up and pent up 2007-06-12 - 1-800-SUICIDE 2007-06-09 - What the fuck? 2007-06-04 - To Do list 2007-05-19 - (No title) 2007-05-18 - PMS again. 2007-04-29 - (No title) 2007-04-29 - (No title) 2007-04-28 - (No title) 2007-04-26 - It's never going to stop. 2007-04-18 - (No title) 2007-03-20 - (No title) 2007-02-13 - (No title) 2007-02-02 - (No title) 2007-01-29 - (No title) 2007-01-12 - (No title) 2007-01-10 - (No title) 2007-01-10 - What the fuck is wrong with everyone 2006-12-30 - (No title) 2006-12-24 - (No title) 2006-12-24 - (No title) 2006-12-23 - (No title) 2006-12-23 - I wish you would step back from that ledge 2006-12-15 - (No title) 2006-12-13 - (No title) 2006-12-11 - (No title) 2006-12-10 - (No title) 2006-12-09 - (No title) 2006-12-05 - (No title) 2006-12-03 - (No title) 2006-12-01 - (No title) 2006-11-29 - (No title) 2006-11-27 - (No title) 2006-11-24 - (No title) 2006-11-23 - (No title) 2006-11-21 - Damn it. 2006-11-20 - (No title) 2006-11-20 - This is not good. 2006-11-20 - (No title) 2006-11-19 - (No title) 2006-11-18 - (No title) 2006-11-16 - (No title) 2006-11-15 - (No title) 2006-11-14 - (No title) 2006-11-13 - (No title) 2006-11-12 - (No title) 2006-11-10 - (No title) 2006-11-08 - (No title) First post from the old Blogger diary 2006-11-03 - Last night 2006-11-03 - Oh my god. 2006-11-02 - God damn it. 2006-11-01 - Can we show our faces now? 2006-10-31 - Vamos a jugar por la playa 2006-10-30 - I don't know. 2006-10-29 - So I went to a party tonight. 2006-10-25 - This is me. 2006-10-05 - I just can't let myself be happy. 2006-10-01 - Hooray. 2006-09-30 - All disease is mind disease 2006-08-04 - Pardon me while I burst into flames. 2006-07-25 - I think I broke my toe last night? 2006-07-10 - Survey, etc. 2006-06-19 - I want to get high. 2006-06-16 - Things I want to do. 2006-05-28 - Ridiculously long survey 2006-05-28 - Lonely 2006-05-26 - Relationship survey. 2006-05-25 - Adulthood and money 2006-05-22 - Survey, worrying, people 2006-05-19 - Freaking out, I guess 2006-05-15 - My lips are always chapped no matter what. 2006-05-07 - I guess I have a crush? 2006-05-02 - Life pretty much sucks right now. 2006-04-29 - Thinking about stuff 2006-04-18 - Stage fright 2006-04-13 - Uuuuugh. 2006-04-05 - I fill out too many of these. 2006-03-30 - If people at work knew what I did at home... 2006-03-29 - Ugh 2006-03-27 - It's so cold in Alaska 2006-03-22 - My feet have pins and needles. 2006-03-16 - Uuuugh. 2006-03-11 - Fuck the beautiful people. 2006-03-04 - Surveys are for attention whores 2006-03-03 - Is that so much to ask? 2006-02-13 - Maybe something is wrong with me. 2006-02-02 - Dermatillomania 2006-01-24 - Some idiot made a survey. 2006-01-23 - Hey, fuck you, everybody. 2006-01-14 - My life 2006-01-06 - Hey it's 2006. 2005-12-18 - New boyfriend! 2005-11-26 - I suck. 2005-11-19 - My teeth feel weird. 2005-11-13 - Take me to the place I love 2005-11-10 - My eye hurts. 2005-11-03 - Bleh 2005-11-02 - It's no good because you're everywhere. 2005-10-31 - Fuck you, Halloween. 2005-10-29 - Hello, my name is ANS and I'm a blogwhore. 2005-10-26 - Hot lovin' in Kansas City 2005-10-23 - Fucking cheating bastard. 2005-10-22 - Bleh. 2005-10-21 - Hey, new diary. (Not really, this is the first entry from an old blog) 2005-03-27 - A very merry unbirthday to me 2005-03-08 - I tried hard to have a father but instead I had a dad 2005-02-28 - I lost the will to fight 2005-02-25 - All apologies 2005-02-24 - Vacant 2005-02-23 - Write some words, make them rhyme 2005-02-16 - How does it feel to be loved? 2005-02-14 - I got no emotions for anybody else. 2005-02-05 - Paint it black 2005-01-12 - Can you help me occupy my brain? 2004-12-23 - You're in my web now 2004-12-22 - It's the most wonderful time of the year 2004-12-18 - I could sure use a vacation... 2004-12-12 - Nothing is real but pain now 2004-12-11 - A dream for us 2004-12-08 - I don't like you, no way 2004-11-18 - I'm a negative creep 2004-10-31 - Trick or treat, the bitter and the sweet 2004-10-15 - Well, I still don't seem to care 2004-09-16 - A lot of nothing to say 2004-08-30 - Bullshit talk is just a sad excuse to make yourself feel important 2004-08-26 - No recess! No recess! 2004-08-19 - It's the pretty things that we're always breaking 2004-08-15 - Can he see or is he blind? 2004-07-31 - I lost the will to fight 2004-07-18 - I am frowning all the time 2004-07-12 - Villains always blink their eyes 2004-06-30 - Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart 2004-06-26 - I've been picking scabs again 2004-06-25 - I could sleep for a thousand years 2004-06-23 - To see what occurs behind the eyes of a fallen angel 2004-06-22 - Fill your head all full of lies 2004-06-18 - I'm too busy acting like I'm not naive 2004-06-10 - The more you change the less you feel 2004-06-08 - I met her at the Burger King, fell in love at the soda machine 2004-06-04 - Some people call me Maurice. 2004-06-02 - He's gone, my lover's gone and left me brokenhearted 2004-05-30 - You children of today are children of the grave 2004-05-28 - Escape from brainwashed minds 2004-05-27 - Fuck fuck fuck! 2004-05-20 - No recess 2004-05-14 - Blackened 2004-05-10 - Like a sick child 2004-05-04 - Is she weird 2004-04-26 - It is time for stormy weather 2004-04-25 - Bland boring plain 2004-04-22 - \"What a lovely day,\" says the butcher as he raises his arm. 2004-04-16 - And she would cry, \"Liar, liar!\" 2004-04-14 - The worst is over 2004-04-10 - But I deserve more than arrogance 2004-04-02 - Difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed 2004-04-01 - Butcher the song 2004-03-29 - Pretty vacant 2004-03-28 - What did he say to make you so goddamn defiant? 2004-03-22 - Give in, give in, give up 2004-03-16 - We'll live happily ever after 2004-03-13 - Girls just want to have fun 2004-02-13 - I'm a loser, baby 2004-01-26 - I think I'm dumb, or maybe just happy 2004-01-15 - I'm sorry that I hit you, but my string snapped. 2004-01-10 - Sometimes I resent making friends and acquaintances 2003-12-19 - I hardly exist at all. 2003-12-15 - I don't want to feel this overwhelming hostility. 2003-12-10 - Give me one more medicated, peaceful moment 2003-11-25 - I fell asleep on my ARM! 2003-11-22 - Icicles hung down like prison bars 2003-11-18 - Shades of red of a furious defeat 2003-11-18 - I swear I tried to care 2003-11-17 - Some things just can't be cured, or covered up 2003-11-17 - Day after bloodsucking day 2003-11-16 - Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea 2003-11-15 - Let it burst and bloom 2003-11-14 - Who am I if I'm alone? 2003-11-14 - Sink to the beat
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